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Game of Thrones is Soft-Core Porn (Duh!)

I personally, as a gay man, watch the parade of areolas attached to voluptuous boobies that is part of any given episode and my dick lays dormant and disinterested (the same can be said about the occasional floppy cock that graces my 46” LCD screen)… This article is about what you, as an actor, are willing to do on stage or screen.

game3Ladies, Show us Your Tits!

I had a very interesting conversation with a straight male colleague regarding my favourite HBO Series, Game of Thrones. I explained to him that I was re-watching the series from the beginning as I read through, book by book.

“I refuse to watch it. A ten year old is forced to suck on a forty-year-old ladies tit. It’s not right. I like porn as much (if not more) than the next guy… but this is porn pretending to be a television series, and I’m not into that.”

His statement and sentiments got me thinking. Of course Game of Thrones is incredible explicit in its sexual content, but I had never classified it as soft-core porn… so I did a bit more research by asking a manager at my work if he gets horny by watching the mega-series in question. He politely confirmed my suspicious by saying coyly, “Let me go watch the lesbian finger-banging sex scene [in Season One] a few times and I’ll get back to you.” Then he told me table 32 wants their bill and strolled away.

I personally, as a gay man, watch the parade of areolas attached to voluptuous boobies that is part of any given episode and my dick lays dormant and disinterested (the same can be said about the occasional floppy cock)… But, I am a gay man. As a straight man I imagine that watching an episode of Game of Thrones would be like giving your dick an hour-long callisthenic work-out.

Now, the point of this article is not about whether or not Game of Thrones is soft-core porn. It is… clearly it is. This article is about what you, as an actor, are willing to do on stage or screen. I have always believed (and still do) that should nudity be called for in the text, if it is justified and completely non-gratuitous, then I will bare all with just cause. In fact, I have had the great pleasure of playing dick-out in a production of Bryden Macdonald’s Whale Riding Weather. This production was brought to the Brighton, England (the gayest place on earth). Suffice it to say, the production did quite well.

Now, was I ignorant enough to think that my naked body did not end up in the spank-banks of many an old gay man? No, certainly not. However, did that knowledge of what an old gay man did with my naked image inhibit me in any way from performing the task asked of me by Bryden Macdonald? No. It didn’t.

But, let me play devil’s advocate for just one second. When I was a young impressionable born-again-Christian (in a past life), I remember clearly what my preacher said on the Sunday morning of The Academy Awards: “Tonight, the world will celebrate in the debauchery that film represents. They will honour those who should rightfully be shamed by their actions of sexuality. They will encourage the downward spiral that breeds immorality. I ask all of you to avoid such celebrations.”

Trust me, I know, my upbringing is fucked; but, that being said, I think this preacher had a point of sorts. Actors are asked to do so many things that borderline on indecency, vulgarity, and personal exploitation. That is the world we live in folks, and that is the industry that we live to serve.

A friend of mine recently told me that she booked her second Actra credit. After I congratulated her profusely (and drunkenly), I asked her what the job was. “I was in a scene where they were making Sponge Bob/Tentacle Porn (in the television show that is). I was completely naked aside from a small sponge that was strapped to my vagina and my co-star was a small octopus… He was great to work with.” She grinned, and chuckled. I was in awe of her in this moment. She had a role offered her that asked her to do this ridiculous thing. She did it. She owned it. And she was proud as fuck, as she should be.

So, ladies, let me ask you a question: If you were to audition for an HBO series, would you go tits-out if you had to? Would you be in a scene where you had to finger-bang another chick? Would you be willing to strap a sponge to your vagina? Gentlemen, would you be willing to bare the family jewels and show the world what you’re made of? What are you willing to do to be an actor? There is no wrong answer and there is no shame in doing these things, or not. But, if you are serious about pursuing a career in acting, this will come up sooner or later. And you will have to decide what kind of actor you will be and what kind of art you will stand for.


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Caleb McMullen

Written by Caleb McMullen

Founder and Editor-in-Chief of TheatreisforSuckers.com

There is 1 comment

  • IT’S NOT PORN… IT’S HBO.

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